Divorce Support: Overcoming Archetypes and Constraints

Divorce is a journey that challenges every aspect of who we are. As you navigate this tumultuous path, you might find yourself limited by the archetypes you’ve grown into and the constraints that seem insurmountable. These archetypes—whether inherited from family or shaped by society—can serve as both a guiding light and a restrictive force. In this article, we’ll explore the archetype I personally embraced and how it clashed with the realities of divorce, and we’ll look at how to overcome these constraints to find divorce support for your path forward.

Divorce Support and the Archetype We Inherit

For many of us, our sense of self and duty is heavily influenced by our upbringing. My own archetype, learned largely from my father, was built on values like hard work, providing for the family, putting family above self, enduring obligations, and living by the Golden Rule. These are virtues that many would agree are the cornerstones of a strong character:

• Commitment
• Endurance
• Love of Family

But when faced with divorce, these same values can feel like chains, binding us to outdated expectations that no longer serve us in this new reality.

The Influence of Society’s Archetype

Beyond our family, society imposes its own set of beliefs—work hard, succeed, advance your education, and remember that success begins and ends with money. Competition becomes a way of life, and our worth often feels tied to our ability to meet these societal expectations.

The Crisis of Divorce

Divorce shakes the very foundation of these archetypes. The beliefs that once guided you now seem like burdens:

• “If I work harder, I will lose more.”
• “Why do I have to provide under the same set of rules when we are not married?”
• “I need to protect my kids, but how can I do that if I’m struggling to protect myself?”
• “Obligation was easier when we were a family unit, but now it feels unbearable.”
• “The way I am being treated is not fair.”

These thoughts are not just challenging—they’re overwhelming. It’s natural to want to retreat, to go into a protective shell. Human instinct kicks in, signaling danger and urging you to defend and protect. The future feels uncertain, and so you do what you can to prepare for the worst.

Divorce Support and the Harsh Reality of Divorce Constraints

One of the starkest realities of divorce is the sudden creation of a second household. Most couples, if asked whether they could afford a second household on their current income, would say no. Yet, divorce forces this very situation upon you, often without adequate financial support.

Divorce is a silent pandemic—one that society and the government do little to address. While other crises may attract funding and support, divorce often leaves you to fend for yourself, navigating a complex judicial system that can drain your resources and leave you feeling lost.

Overcoming the Constraints

I know you face numerous constraints—income, time, energy. These limitations can make you feel like you’re trapped in a situation with no way out. But there is hope, and it starts with recognizing the resources you do have, both within yourself and in the support systems around you.

When I went through my own divorce, I reached out to my spiritual coach, Steve D’Annunzio. It was a significant investment, but I knew that my old patterns of control and self-reliance weren’t going to work in this new chapter of my life. I realized that money and societal definitions of success were not the keys to happiness.

Divorce Support: Moving Forward Together

As I work to bring effective and creative solutions to the area of divorce, I am constantly trying to align my knowledge with the reality of your situation. One challenge of podcasts is that they are primarily a one-way form of communication. While I can share insights and guidance, I can’t fully understand your unique circumstances unless you engage with me.

This is why I’m committing to expanding our engagement through the Divorce Support Center on  Patreon. It’s not just about delivering content; it’s about creating a space where we can interact, where your feedback can shape the support I provide. If Patreon isn’t for you, please reach out through my website. Let me know how I can best serve you. In return, I promise not to flood your inbox with constant marketing emails. My goal is to offer real value, tailored to your needs, within the constraints you face.

Conclusion

Divorce doesn’t have to define you or confine you to the limitations of your archetype and the constraints of your situation. By recognizing the influences that shape your decisions and being open to new ways of thinking and support, you can begin to build a new life—one that reflects your true self and values. Let’s work together to find the path forward, breaking free from the old patterns and constraints that no longer serve you.