Separation Tips for Dads

By Steve Schleupner, Mediator, CFP®, CDFA®, CDC®, ChFC®

Here are nine essential tips to guide you through the challenging process of separation, helping you to reduce stress and set yourself on the right track:

  1. Perspective on Fairness: It’s natural to feel like the system is unfair at times during a divorce. However, dwelling on perceived injustices only drains your energy and focus. Instead, confront your feelings of unfairness and channel them into constructive action. Face your fears head-on and strive to see new perspectives that empower rather than disempower you.

  2. Identify Energy Drains: Take stock of what drains your energy and distracts you from moving forward. Whether it’s unnecessary text conversations with your ex or negative news consumption, pinpoint these energy drains and work on eliminating or minimizing them. Guard your mental energy fiercely during this challenging time.

  3. Create Ideal Days: Envision what your ideal day looks like, considering both the time spent with your children and your personal well-being. Be realistic about your responsibilities and commitments, and strive to create a daily routine that fosters meaningful connections and self-care.

  4. Practice Gratitude: Cultivate a mindset of gratitude by focusing on the blessings and gifts in your life, however small they may seem. Regularly reflect on what you’re thankful for, and let this positive energy guide your actions and interactions with others.

  5. Set Intentions: Take time to reflect on what you truly want out of this period of transition. Set clear intentions for yourself, focusing on your personal growth, relationships, and overall well-being. Write down your intentions and revisit them regularly to stay aligned with your goals.

  6. Establish PM/AM Routines: Prioritize quality sleep and establish evening and morning routines that support your physical and mental health. Create a conducive environment for restorative sleep and use the quiet moments of the morning to reflect and set intentions for the day ahead.

  7. Seek Support: Don’t hesitate to reach out for support from trained professionals or trusted friends and family members. Surround yourself with a supportive network that can offer guidance, empathy, and encouragement as you navigate this challenging time.

  8. Be Financially Savvy: Take proactive steps to manage your finances effectively during this period of transition. Assess your financial situation, prioritize saving, and consider adjusting your savings strategy to accommodate your current circumstances. Be mindful of your financial stability and plan accordingly for any unforeseen challenges.

  9. Find Solace in Nature: Spend time in nature to find clarity and grounding amidst the chaos of separation. Whether it’s hiking alone or simply enjoying the outdoors, allow yourself the space to reconnect with yourself and find peace amidst the turmoil.

Remember, you have the strength and resilience to navigate this journey with courage and grace. Trust in yourself, stay grounded, and embrace the opportunities for growth and healing that lie ahead.

Steven-Schleupner

Steve Schleupner specializes as a Divorce Transition Specialist, viewing divorce not just as an event but as a transformative life journey. His approach involves empowering clients to strategize for the long haul. Acting as a mediator, Steve presents various options aimed at reducing conflict and enhancing financial acumen, enabling clients to reach settlement agreements with clarity and assurance. Beyond the finalization of divorce decrees, he remains a steadfast guide, assisting clients in implementing their plans and adjusting them as circumstances evolve. With over two decades of financial planning expertise and seven years dedicated specifically to divorce coaching, Steve brings a wealth of knowledge to his practice. He holds certifications as a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® professional, a Certified Financial Planner® professional, and a Certified Divorce Coach® in addition to his mediation qualifications.

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